You’re holding on to so much.

You’re always on top of managing everything, taking care of everybody, and feeling pressure to never let anyone down.

You may not have even realized until recently that you have been suffering due to suppressing your own needs and emotions.

You’ve reached a breaking point due to feelings that can no longer be ignored. Physical health or life circumstances that have made you realize that you are ready for change.

If you are looking for therapy in California, I mainly serve clients from Santa Barbara to Westlake Village and can help.

Hummingbird getting a drink from a flower - online therapy Santa Barbara, Montecito, Carpinteria, Ventura, Ojai, Moorpark, Thousand Oaks, Westlake Village, Simi Valley, Oak Park, Agoura Hills, and Malibu
Succulent feeling prickly representing need for online therapy in California with Brianne Billups Hughes

You may feel…

  • Resentful of the people around you
  • Out of touch with your anger or sadness
  • Surprised by your reactions in relationships
  • Shutting down, pulling away, or being indirect feels easier
  • That it is safer to have people need you than for you to need them
  • Worried what others may think of you if you were to make a change
  • That it is easier to say yes and just make it happen instead of telling someone no
  • Panic, fear or general overwhelm in various circumstances
  • You can’t trust others around you to meet your needs
  • Uncomfortable with overwhelming feelings or crying
  • Anxious and worried about disappointing people
  • Everyone needs you to hold it together for them
  • Afraid to upset the balance

It has been this way for a while now.

If you grew up in a home where your caregivers or those around you were unwell and distracted it may have been adaptive to set aside your own needs in order to care for others.

Examples of this include children of parents (or siblings) who were physically or mentally ill, physically or emotionally absent, disabled, or abusing drugs or alcohol. I work with many adults who as children were “parentified” and stepped into an emotional or practical caretaking role either to their parents, their siblings, or themselves at a young age.

This can result in a childhood cut short and produce a high achieving adult who is very efficient at working or caretaking but may be out of tune with their own feelings and needs.

California Scrub Jay - therapy in Malibu, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades and throughout California

Therapy in Santa Barbara to Westlake Village, California for:

Insight into what is really happening.

Often times circumstances, conditioning, and upbringing shape who you are or how you react. I can help you understand why you are doing what you are doing in the bigger context of your life.

Usually, there are bigger patterns at play that must first be understood before they can be changed.

You’re ready to…

  • Hold boundaries that allow you to have loving relationships with both yourself and others
  • Find a sustainable balance between working or other obligations and having fun doing the things you love
  • Feel like other’s opinions and expectations have less of a hold on you so you can be true to yourself
  • Trust yourself, your decisions, and your own inner knowing
  • Deepen and improve your relationships
  • Break old patterns that have been holding you back
  • Reach a conclusion on something you have felt undecided about or conflicted over
  • Understand your thoughts and feelings on a deeper level
  • Learn to communicate from a place of honesty and compassion
Butterfly on a branch ready to fly. California therapist in Malibu, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades

Taking care of yourself is a priority.

I help people find authenticity by learning to be true to themselves, setting boundaries, and having the courage to take risks and achieve their dreams.

Let’s look into the “why” of how you got to where you are today in order to move past what may you be holding you back from experiencing true joy, peace, and fulfillment.

I offer online therapy in California to adults who are ready for change.

Reach Out Today

Enough of the suffering. Let’s work together to get you out of pain and back to joy!